It’s been two years since I shared why I chose to wear the number 17 (read about it here) during my time at Iowa State, and a year ago I began a new journey with an old but unforgotten number; 10.
It happened as quickly and with just as much ease as last time. I was simply given a small list of numbers to choose from, 10 being one of them.
To Elizabeth and I this is a simple way of “moving on” and making this journey my own. I’ve had the dream of playing volleyball overseas since 8th grade. I had made up my mind then that no matter what I was going to give playing overseas a shot. If after one season I did not like it then I could move on, but I never wanted to live my life with the question of “what if…” if I didn’t least give it a try.
When I wore #17 it was not so Elizabeth could live vicariously through me. No, it was a reminder about why we play, the privilege of sport, and to honor her love for the game. Now, I wear the #10 with pride – As someone who not only had a dream but as someone who is now able to say I’m living it out. All the hours of work, volleyball, schooling that got me to this point. For the voices of doubt and fear in my head, for the homesickness, tears, emotions, life lessons and friends I’ve made along the way… Wearing the number 10 reminds me of being a little girl going to Penn State volleyball matches, being a ball girl, and wiping up their sweat, having those same women coach me and them going to play overseas… I do it for the girl who fell in love with the game. The number 10 reminds me to never give up on my dreams and passions. It’s a sense of comfort when I’m outside of my comfort zone and motivation when I lack it.
A section from my first journal entry in Finland last year reads:
Thoughts and emotions so far… sometimes I’m super happy and other times I’m like “WHAT THE FRICK DID I GET MYSELF INTO?!”
Every time I read that it makes me laugh because I still have the same feelings, but honestly I wouldn’t want it any other way. I’ve found that where I’m happiest is in the midst of trying new things and following my passions.
I write this as an encouragement to you, a spring board if you will, to take action. What are your dreams? What are you passionate about? It’s okay to be unsure about the outcome, but I’m going to be so bold as to say it’s not okay to not try because you’re unsure about the outcome. It’s that much more rewarding to know if it was worth the risk, because most of the time it’s worth it and blesses you more than you could have ever imagined. 😉
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